How to say he made many grammatical mistakes in his composition. in Japanese

1)彼(kare) (ok) that , or something understood without naming it directly)/that person/over there/hey/eh?/thatは(ha) (int) indicating a subject/yes/indeed/well/ha!/what?/huh?/sigh作文作文(sakubun) (n,vs) writing/composition/formal writing with little real meaningで(de) (prt) indicates location of action/at/in/indicates time of action/indicates means of action/cause of effect/by/and then/so/indicates continuing action/ indicates certainty, emphasis, etc.沢山沢山(takusan) (adj-na,adv,n) many/a lot/muchの(no) (prt) indicates possessive/nominalizes verbs and adjectives/substitutes for "ga" in subordinate phrases/indicates a confident conclusion/ indicates emotional emphasis/indicates question文法上no dictionary result, likely a conjigated verbno dictionary result, likely a conjigated verbの(no) (prt) indicates possessive/nominalizes verbs and adjectives/substitutes for "ga" in subordinate phrases/indicates a confident conclusion/ indicates emotional emphasis/indicates question間違い間違い(machigai) (n) mistake/error/blunder/accident/mishap/trouble/improper conduct/indiscretionを(wo) (prt) indicates direct object of action/indicates subject of causative expression/indicates an area traversed/indicates time over which action takes place/indicates point of departure or separation of action/indicates object of desire, like, hate,したした(shita) (n) did/a past form of the previous verb/tongue/tongue-like object/clapper/talon。(。) Japanese period "."    
kareha sakubun de takusan no bunpoujou no machigai woshita 。
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2)彼(kare) (ok) that , or something understood without naming it directly)/that person/over there/hey/eh?/thatは(ha) (int) indicating a subject/yes/indeed/well/ha!/what?/huh?/sigh作文作文(sakubun) (n,vs) writing/composition/formal writing with little real meaning(prt) indicates location of action/at/in/indicates time of action/indicates means of action/cause of effect/by/and then/so/indicates continuing action/ indicates certainty, emphasis, etc.たくさん(adj-na,adv,n) many/a lot/muchの(no) (prt) indicates possessive/nominalizes verbs and adjectives/substitutes for "ga" in subordinate phrases/indicates a confident conclusion/ indicates emotional emphasis/indicates question文法上no dictionary result, likely a conjigated verbno dictionary result, likely a conjigated verbの(no) (prt) indicates possessive/nominalizes verbs and adjectives/substitutes for "ga" in subordinate phrases/indicates a confident conclusion/ indicates emotional emphasis/indicates question誤り誤り(ayamari) (n) error/mistake/slip/bugを(wo) (prt) indicates direct object of action/indicates subject of causative expression/indicates an area traversed/indicates time over which action takes place/indicates point of departure or separation of action/indicates object of desire, like, hate,したした(shita) (n) did/a past form of the previous verb/tongue/tongue-like object/clapper/talon。(。) Japanese period "."    
kareha sakubun detakusanno bunpoujou no ayamari woshita 。
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